… missing people and places we have met during our lives, to family and loved ones we think of, to missing Sweden and all its lovely weirdness, to nature and beauty, to tears and laughter, to love and loss, to life and death. This is to all the things that are part of living and still not understanding one single thing.
Last night we stayed up late, talking about what we want and need right now.
All of a sudden we realized we easily get caught up in what is happening around us here, and that we quite often do things when what we really need in that moment is to take a deep breath and ask ourselves what we want to do or what’s most needed for us right now.
Saying yes to invitations, or to take another step into local life in order to learn and understand more is at times extremely tiresome and challenging. Lots of fun of course, and tiresome.
We start to understand how used we are to having time on our own, to be able to walk out a door without meeting a single person (yes, in Sweden one can actually be alone rather often), how we are longing for the sometimes isolated life many Swedish people live – that we also not always like – it is nice when people come together to help and care for each other.
We start to wonder how to get the mix we’d like to have – to have a place to stay where we can choose when to meet with others and when to be alone. Where people greet and care for each other, are willing to help and still give one another privacy. Where it’s ok to say yes to dinner today, and no thanks tomorrow. Where there are less questions about how we choose to lead our lives and more acceptance for differences. Where the climate is good and there is an openness to views if life we’re not familiar with. Where love flows and there’s a big acceptance for people.
Sure, we’re the first to say that we are all responsible for creating a way of living and an surrounding environment that we like and can thrive in. And yet there are certain things we as humans can not control, and most certainly we can not change others – only ourselves. So who are we, Anders and Wivan, in the middle of all these thoughts and longings?
Right now I think we have more questions than answers, and accept that fact. Who knows what will happen today or tomorrow. We’ll take our responsibility for ourselves and see to our needs, and from that we see what happens and where we end up.
With love, gratitude and many questions,