Acceptance

This beautiful little word with three c:s, two a:s and two e:s. And one t, one p and one n.

Acceptance.

Anders last Saturday

Today two people, both named Anders, have reminded me of the importance to embrace, love and cherish the word: acceptance.

Even more so to take in the meaning of the word.

I guess it can have slightly different meaning to all of us, or change depending on our current situation and status.

A highland cattle that Anders met on a walk today

On the cards with different mental strategies for mindfulness I have, it says:

If you have problems; change them or let them be. Don’t start an inner fight against them. Don’t make them heavy or solid – they are what they are.

Ever heard of making a hen from a feather? Well, let’s say it is often easy to look at “problems” or obstacles as if it’s huge. But with a broader perspective it becomes smaller or even dissapears.

Anders and I on a walk

Is there something in your life you could look at from a different angle to see it from a greater perspective?

With love,

Wivan

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Saturday and a slow start

Breakfast in bed

It’s a bit special for me nowadays to wake up and have breakfast at home. Usually, during work-days, I get ready quickly in the morning to be at work before 5.30 am. My breakfast is prepared the night before and I make my own coffee to bring in a thermo-cup to work.

I love my work hours, It’s no problem for me to get up in the morning and to get off by lunch is awesome – especially during winter so I can get some daylight in the afternoon.

At the gym in Colorado last summer

Saturdays and Sundays though are a nice break, and I love to start the day in another tempo, and without rush.

Often I think of going to the gym on Saturdays, but I get stuck with a book, coffee and relax by the breakfast table instead. Or prioritize going for a walk.

Poster on my niece and nephews’s school

Earlier in life, I was often picturing a more free life where I could spend my time however I wanted, without stress. And over the past years I have lived just like that a lot more.

Even now, when I work full time, I feel rather free most of the time, and I know it has a lot to do with my attitude towards priorities, “musts and shoulds”, how I think about time and also that I feel less stress over what others think of me and rather look to what I need and want.

As I write this, I see how far I’ve come on my personal journey, and how rewarding all the coaching sessions, reading, deep thinking and looking at my less charming thoughts and behaviours have payed off. For this I am grateful.

So, I’m ready to go out and meet  this day with curiosity and love and I hope you are too.

Love, Wivan 

Our current situation:

Want to write a short update on what’s going on with these two life travellers who’ve been parked in Sweden for almost a year now.

Karlskrona a few weeks ago

  • Still in Sweden
  • Anders is recovering from years and years of mental and physical stress
  • My new work-contract is until 1:st of March 2018
  • Two homes: Kristianstad and Aspö
  • Have started our second round of IVF (assisted conception)
  • Live a lot in the “unknown” when it comes to planning and trying to control our situation, energy-levels, time schedule and activities 
  • Focus on living a good and joyful basic life where sleep, fresh air, physical movement, reading, eating good food and taking care of our relationship are the keys

    My bike today…

    Skating om the lake Immeln a few weeks ago

    January walk by the water on Aspö

    Aspö in January

    After breakfast

    Sunrise, before my breakfast

    This Thursday holds many possibilities, as most days do. Sometimes we might forget all the possible things to do, be, have or find – because we are busy planning or thinking about plans.

    Now I have had vacation for almost two weeks, been at home all the time and enjoyed sleeping until the daylight comes – no alarm clock and no routines, just take the day as it is. Still there have been some planning going on: when to visit grandma, what day to go to the gym, calling to a office-person on certain hours and celebrating New Year on the exact day and time – that takes planning!

    Coffee grinder

    This morning I remembered what one of our friends in France use to say when we ask what’s on today’s schedule.

    – After breakfast, he says.

    No decisions until he’s had breakfast. Of course, he does have days that are planned: going to the market on Saturday or when friends are coming for dinner etc. But when it’s a blank day in the calendar, it’s always ‘after breakfast’.

    Green breakfast smoothie with banana, spinach, avocado, raspberries, water, chili and ginger

    Before breakfast today I took a walk and decided to not make any plans until I had eaten my breakfast. So here I am, finishing up my coffee, rice cakes and smoothie – with no idea of what comes next in this day.

    Bialetti coffee maker doing its job

    I love to play in life – not always being so serious or “grown up”. This too is a way of playing: to see what really wants to unfold today.

    My morning meal is almost finished and I am excited to find out what comes out of this day!

    //Wivan

    The dark night

    Full moon

    When I was studying yoga a bit deeper some five years ago, my teacher at times spoke about The dark night of the soul. It was an expression used for the days and nights when the inner work, seeking and whatever comes up gets so dark you think it will never light up again. When everything feels meaningless, depressing, hard and without any hope.
    The dark night of the soul. It sounds rather beautiful in some way.

    This is how Eckhart Tolle explains it:

    It is a term used to describe what one could call a collapse of a perceived meaning in life…an eruption into your life of a deep sense of meaninglessness.  The inner state in some cases is very close to what is conventionally called depression.

    Eckhart Tolle

    Anyways, the past week or so it has felt like the winter in southern Sweden has gone through the Dark night of the soul. It has been so dark for so many hours and I have had a hard time coping with it. Yesterday I wanted to go to bed by 5 pm just to be able to wake up again when it was daylight the next day. The nights have felt extremely long.

    Star light

    I have spoken to people who have been complaining over lack of energy, having doubts about this and that in life and that old trash has surfaced again in their mind. All of this reminded me about another thing we spoke about a lot in those intense yoga classes and courses I took: the natural rythm of life.
    In our modern world we tend to forget that we as humans have a natural cycle that we follow whether we like it or not. For us living in countries where we have seasons, our bodies and minds usually follow the seasons.

    In spring we often fall in love, want to grow and create and feel how life and energy comes back.

    In summer we often like to nourish our bodies, relationships and minds. (as the farmers wanter and nourish the plants). 

    In fall we start to harvest the things we have been working on earlier in the year, we stack up on food and often like to gather with friends.

    In winter we like to slow down, rest more and our thoughts become more introspective.

    Simply put: We become more thoughtful and tend to look more inwards and like to reflect on life and who we are during winter. It’s part of our natural cycle and something we can embrace rather than run away from.

    The world of 2016 provides a lot of things and activities to escape from all kind of introspection and deeper thinking. It is up to us to dare and allow ourselves to slow down and look inward for a moment or two.

    Who knows what is on the other side of that Dark night?

    // Wivan

    Clearing out and looking inside

    Beautiful light in the morning

    A few days ago I watched the last episode of a television show called Naked (Naken in Swedish), where four people do a month-long experiment where all of their belongings are taken away from them and they get to take only one thing/piece of clothing back per day during the 30 day experiment.

    It has been interesting to watch, especially what happens to these people when mobile phones and other distractions are taken away from them. And how they get creative in new ways when there is something they want but don’t have money.

    The sky…

    It has also been interesting to see, hear and follow one of the participants who felt depressed when the experiment came to an end and she was about to get all of her belongings back. She had found out things about herself and her life and simply didn’t want to go back to her old life.

    And two months after the experiment was over, she still lived accordingly to some of those insights – no social media and less time with distractions and more time living in the moment. She hadn’t been taking a selfie or been in a picture in two months! (before the experiment she was constantly online and chatting, posting pictures etc).

    View from my morning walk

    This woman inspired me to delete the Instagram app that I’ve been addicted to lately – as an experiment during my two weeks off from work, just to see what it feels like. I’ve been off Facebook for a year and a half and haven’t missed it at all, and now I am ready to try and live a bit more away from other people’s updates for a while and simply spend more time with myself and the people and things I meet irl.

    Winter in Sweden

    Afternoon in Åhus, Sweden

    The past two years we’ve spent the winter abroad, we’ve been in France, Egypt, Turkey, Indonesia, Singapore, Thailand and Sri Lanka.

    This year we’ve decided to stay in Sweden for several reasons. It’s a choice we’re happy with, though our thoughts often touch the warm beaches we’ve been to and our bodies long for sunshine and fresh fruit.

    Dressed for a day at the beach in Sweden in December

    Who knows what the future brings, maybe we’ll staying in a sunny and warm place again next year.

    Frosty morning some weeks ago

    For now, we treasure the days of sunshine and try to get outside during daylight every day. (Sweden is rather dark this time of year).

    Morning at Aspö

    Hope you enjoy your days wherever you are!

    //Wivan and Anders